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Breaking Bedlam (Beautiful Bedlam Book 2) Page 7
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Page 7
“I’m fine, sweetheart. Trust me I’m not going anywhere any time soon.” Maria replied calmly.
“Mom, you’re not fine. Please for once in your life will you just please tell the truth!” Sienna hissed. Her mom returned her with a steely glare.
“I am telling the truth. You’re sick. You need help.” She said in a low voice.
“That’s it! I’ve had enough of your constant lies. Mom cheated on dad at least twice!” Sienna shouted putting two fingers up in the air for emphasis and began pacing around.
“Do you even know what the hell you’re saying Sienna?” Cora scolded her little sister for her ridiculous accusations. Mom and dad were completely and madly in love. She would never in a million years have ever cheated on dad! She looked at her sister’s jumpy eyes jumping from corner to corner wildly. She noticed her tugging on her ear nervously every few seconds. That wasn’t the first time she had seen her do that. Mom was right. There was something seriously wrong with Sienna.
“She cheated on dad with another guy; with my biological father. Dad found out and forgave her but then she cheated on dad again this time with Logan’s dad and had Annie and-“ Sienna began rambling and explaining herself very quickly as she saw the trio looking down at her as if she were a broken toy that needed fixing or throwing away.
“Sienna calm down.” Meredith barked angrily as if that was magically going to tranquilize her.
“Don’t tell me to calm down! You calm down! Why is no one even listening?” she hissed. The ringing in her left ear returned again, the sound was almost deafeningly loud and piercing gave her a throbbing headache.
“Annie’s dad is Mr. Jackson. Cora, you believe me right?” she asked with pleading eyes. She needed at least somebody on her side.
“Mr. Jackson, Logan’s dad? You mean the Senator?” she asked skeptically.
“Yes! Why’s that so hard to believe? He and mom used to date back in high school! That’s why mom hated me dating Logan. It wasn’t because she hated him, it was because she was scared I would get too close to finding out the truth and I did!” Sienna said breathing heavily. She could feel her eyes prickling and brimming with tears. ‘Why does nobody believe me?’
‘Nobody believes you because nobody believes in you. Besides, nobody believes a nobody.’ That smug patronizing voice in her head sneered at her confusing her furthermore. All three of her family members stared at her for a moment with shocked slightly horrified expressions on their faces.
“What? What now? Why are you all staring at me as if I drowned a damn puppy?” she snapped. She followed their line of sight and looked down at her bare feet riddled with warm ruby rich blood. She carefully lifted her foot up and took out a large piece of porcelain from the broken mug out from her flesh where it had somehow got lodged deep within. She then chucked it in the garbage disposal unit without wincing at all.
“I can prove it! You all think I’m crazy but I’m not. I’m not! Look!” she said and froze as her eyes fell on to the empty island countertop.
“Where are the letters? Mom, where are the damn letters?” she asked and began rummaging in the many cupboards. “What are you talking about? Sienna, just stop, before someone gets hurt!” Maria shouted. “Sienna this is getting ridiculous. Stop! You’re getting blood all over the kitchen tiles!” Meredith yelled and tried to hold her arms and pin her down, as she were a rabid dog. However, Sienna was much more athletic and leaner in structure and squirmed out of her reach easily swatting her way as if she were a fly. Meredith ricocheted off the kitchen countertop and on to the hard cold floor. Sienna snatched the box from the larder and began displaying the letters frantically before turning around to see what she had done. Maria and Cora were crouched over Meredith calling her name hysterically. There was no response.
“What happened?” Sienna gasped terrified. She clasped her hand over her heart in shock.
“You. You happened that’s what. You did this.” Her mother spat out and looked up at her with hot angry tears gushing down her face.
“Me? No. No, No.” Sienna replied shaking her head refusing to believe her. She had only wanted to show everyone the truth. To show everyone that she wasn’t crazy. She never meant to hurt anyone. Cora put her finger to Meredith’s neck.
“She’s fine. She’s just out cold.” She replied.
“I’m moving her to the sofa.” Maria announced happy to leave the room. She couldn’t stand another second looking at the runt of her litter. She was disgusted by her behavior. Why couldn’t she just keep her mouth shut? She asked herself bitterly over and over again.
“Cora, look. The letters, they say the truth. I’m not lying.” Sienna said and outstretched her arm handing her the fistful of letters. Cora put a hand over her eyes and sighed tired of Sienna’s drama. She didn’t understand why anyone would make up such lies. Why on Earth would create problems just for the heck of it? Was it more attention? Cora didn’t know. One thing was for certain; Sienna was clearly unhinged. She had been ever since their father’s funeral.
“Please, just read them. That’s all I’m asking for.” Sienna pleaded. Cora looked in to her sister’s bright green imploring eyes. Green eyes. None of her parents had green eyes, not even her grandparents or aunts or uncles. Everyone had various shades of honey, amber, hazel, brown even grey. No green whatsoever. Although Sienna had inherited her mom’s Columbian curves and long dark hair and full lips, the rest of her came from someone else completely. She was tall and slender whilst they were shorter and stouter in stature. She didn’t look like any of her siblings and nothing like their dad. Maybe, just maybe she was telling the truth. Cora was just about to take the letters scrunched up in Sienna’s fist before their mom snatched it out of her hands making sure she got every single letter and held it in the air away from her reach.
“Don’t listen to her lies. You’re just encouraging her insanity. We must pray for your sister.” Maria said and walked out of the room to the living room where Meredith still lay motionless as a doll. Sienna ran after her only to find her burning the letters in the fireplace.
“See? She’s burning them! Cora look!” she said and spun around to find no one behind her.
“Sienna, just stop it! You’re only making it worse for yourself!” Maria whispered. Her face looked eerily beautiful yet sinister with the light of the fire reflecting against her olive skin.
“I hate you.” Sienna spat out angrily. “I know but you’ll forgive me one day. You’ll have to. I’m the only mother you have. Whereas you on the other hand are not my only daughter.” She replied without a hint of remorse on her face.
“You’re making it look as though I’m some insane lunatic making all of this up! You’re making everyone think that I’m crazy!” she hissed.
“No dear, you’re doing that all by yourself.” Maria replied and stood up and went back to the kitchen to get an icepack for Meredith’s bruised forehead. Sienna followed her again. Cora was on the floor wiping the white tails smeared with blood.
“For goodness sake, can you at least put on a bandage and stop walking around. You’re getting blood everywhere its disgusting.” She hissed angry that she had even considered for a second that she was telling the truth. Sienna grabbed the old high school yearbook and showed Cora the page wherein Mr. Jackson had signed. Look. To Maria, I can’t believe high school’s already over. I don’t know how I’ll manage without you when I’m gone. Although things look they’re about to drastically change for the worst, know that with the welcoming of every new season there comes new opportunities for new memories, memories of us. There can be no blossoms in the spring without the passing of a beautiful white winter. And it goes on and on. And he even signed it; I will love you always and forever, Robert Aaron Jackson. R-A-J.” Sienna read out and showed Cora the picture of their mom and Logan’s dad blissfully happy and young.
“This doesn’t mean anything. I briefly dated Robert in senior year. The relationship lasted all of six months and was over years befor
e I met your father. You don’t honestly believe her do you?” Maria asked hesitantly and nervously laughed. Sienna tugged at her earlobe again. The damn ringing had comeback.
“No. Of course not.” Cora replied quietly.
“But I-“Sienna began but was quickly spoken over.
“Enough Sienna. Just stop it. Stop with all the lies.” Cora said sternly.
“Its not her fault. She’s sick. We’ll get her all the help she needs.” Maria cooed and stroked the hair on Sienna’s head patronizingly.
Sienna clenched her fists and closed her eyes as the voices cackled and laughed like hyenas in her head. “I’m not the one who’s sick. You are. You’re an alcoholic!” Sienna whispered and slapped her mother’s hand away.
“ENOUGH OF THE LIES!” she screeched and backhanded Sienna with full force causing her cheek to sting and her head to spin.
“I’m not lying.” She whispered and put a hand to her burning face. No one was listening. No one cared. It was that simple. A loud thumping sound suddenly resonated from the living room followed by a series of echoes of ‘Ouch!’ Meredith was alive. ‘Great,’ she thought sarcastically. Everyone went scurrying back to the living room. All the movement was beginning to wreck havoc on Sienna’s foot, the pain only starting to kick in now. They found Meredith scowling on the floor. She did not look happy.
“What the hell happened to me?” she snarled as Sienna helped her sit up straight on the leather couch.
“You hit me!” she gasped wide-eyed and winced as her mother placed an ice pack on her forehead. “Not on purpose! I’m sorry.” She apologized feeling genuinely guilty.
“So you should be you crazy bitch! You belong in the psych ward!” Meredith yelled and pushed her away from her. Sienna bit her lip and decided she deserved that dig. Maria sat down in the recently vacated seat next to her daughter and comforted her lovingly. “You okay?” she asked. “I’m fine. No thanks to fruit loops over there.” Meredith replied seething with anger.
“I’m serious mom, she needs to be put in a hospital or a rehab facilitation or somewhere!” Meredith retorted.
“I know, honey. I know.” Maria replied playing the innocent troubled mother card.
“How does all this happen? Do we just drop her off at the nut house? ‘Cos if so, I’ll drive her there right now!” Cora joked. They all began smiling at each other. Sienna just stood there silent as a mouse with the temper of a lion brewing hot in her veins. She felt as though she would explode if she stayed in this house any longer.
“By all means, let’s go! Anywhere but here is perfect because this is the real nut house. You think I’m crazy? Hah!” she laughed hysterically.
“You are a pathological liar with deep rooted commitment and emotional issues!” she yelled and pointed at her mother. “And you are just an antisocially depressed young woman who has such low esteem. Whenever you have any problems you hide from them usually behind Meredith to whom you have clearly share a codependent relationship with, and you end up eating your entire bodyweight in chocolate fudge brownies! And I haven’t even begun about how annoying your OCD is! I mean who irons and folds away socks and underwear? IT’S SOCKS AND UNDERWEAR!” she yelled at Cora and quickly moved on to Meredith.
“And you, Meredith, have severe anger management issues, you possess sadistic qualities that I didn’t even know existed and you’re so prone to violence, you’re like a walking talking poster child for war. Need I say more?” Sienna hissed. She was breathing hard.
“Me? I’m the one prone to violence! You’re the one who knocked me out!” she growled. “That was by accident and we both know it! Besides you were trying to pin me down for no reason! And one accident knock out does not equate to all the times you’ve punched me, kicked me in the stomach so hard I thought I was going to puke my vital organs out, scratched me, pulled my hair, and lets not forget the time when you strangled me!” Sienna recalled.
“What? I haven’t hit you in at least a year! Besides you deserve everything you get!” she replied sounding outraged.
“That’s only ‘cos I’m stronger than you now, and you know it!” Sienna hissed back wishing Meredith had stayed unconscious. “Well if you hate this house so much, why don’t you just go then? GO! GET OUT! NOBODY WANTS YOU HERE! WHY DON’T YOU JUST GO DIE SOMEWHERE! JUST DO US ALL A FAVOR AND DROP DEAD. GO YOU PATHETIC LOSER!” Meredith bellowed furiously. Cora and Maria both gave her disgusted sneers. The unholy trinity stuck together as usual no matter what. ‘The Mother, the Daughter, and the Evil Spirit Cora’ she thought bitterly.
“Why don’t you just go run to your room and cry little girl or better yet kill yourself?” Cora spat out ferociously.
“Oh honey, if I was going to kill myself I’d do it right here out of spite just to see you get down on your knees and wash the blood off the tiles and haunt your ass til kingdom come.” Sienna spat back with even more ferocity. She looked at her sisters and her mother who stared back at her with confusion, disgust and perhaps even a little fear and sighed.
“Fine. You want me out? Done.” Sienna whispered back and darted out of the house. She ran for what felt like hours but could have only been minutes until she finally got to her designation. “Hi daddy.” She whispered.
8.
The Haven Falls graveyard was spectacularly spooky complete with all of its tombstones, archaic statues of Angels and demons. Sienna kneeled down on top of his grave and traced the writing on the engraved headstone. “Here lies Phillip Rivers, husband, father, friend. Father? Really well only to the terrible twosome, at least two out of four is not a complete loss. So well done there. If you could see them now you’d be so proud.” She said sarcastically.
“But you can’t see them can you? You’re dead. You’re nothing but a decomposing rotting mess of blood and bones. No use to any of us. So here’s to Phil and Sienna Rivers two of the most useless people left in this world!” she cheered holding up an imaginary cup. She then slowly lied down next to her father’s grave not caring for once about the dirt or the insects roaming around in the soil. “Except you’re not in this world anymore. You left. You left me alone with nothing but a broken home to go along with my broken heart.” She sighed as fresh warm tears wet the soil beneath her cheek.
“I don’t know if I believe in heaven or hell but wherever you are I hope it’s better than here. This Trojan horse of an earth is so beautiful on the surface but buried deep within is evil and anger and bitter disappointment lurking around waiting to jump out and attack mercilessly at any given unsuspecting moment.” Sienna lay in silence for quite some time without moving. The cool night air would have normally sent Sienna shivering back home but tonight Sienna felt eerily calm and tranquil. A feeling she rarely experienced.
“Meredith can’t find a job. I blame the economy I guess. Either that or the fact that she won’t apply anywhere and is currently sitting at home waiting for someone to hand her a career on a silver platter. I think she means you God.” Sienna said and pointed up at the sky. Sienna put an arm behind her head and leaned her back against the ground. The dark night sky was riddled with tiny specks of light. Starlight. It was a pretty sight. The moon was missing tonight from her view, perhaps he was too busy tonight washing his hair to watch a mentally unstable seventeen year old have a manic episode. Sienna looked over to the east and spotted the big silver stud in the sky smiling down at her knowingly as if he could hear her thoughts. Maybe he didn’t have anything better to do than look down at helpless mere mortals.
“And Cora’s still in community college, still completely depressed with life especially after you bit the dust. Great timing dad, you couldn’t have waited at least another twenty years? Oh and mom’s an alcoholic just FYI. That’s young people talk for ‘for your information’ dad. Guess your death hit her pretty hard too. Annie misses you like crazy. She keeps a picture of you beneath her pillow and kisses it every night before she sleeps. I think somehow that comforts her.” Sienna explained. She waited a few moments before
continuing her rant. “And me, you ask?” she asked shakily.
“I am officially broke, homeless and now I’ve apparently taken up the creepy habit of talking to dead people. Wonderful. But enough of me, who wants to talk about me? All I’d do is make you want to fork out your own eyeballs and wear them as earrings as I bore you with the sad tales of a misunderstood unloved unwanted teenager. Save me the story, I know right? Just skip and watch the movie, that’s what I always do. Okay that’s a lie, I’m a nerd I always read the book first.” She giggled and looked to her right hand side as if her father were lying right beside her just like they used to whenever they went stargazing when she was a kid. “I think this is the longest conversation we’ve ever had.” She said quietly.
“You were always to busy pursuing your love affair with work which amounted to not very much seeing as I’ve got no college money for next year. Mom was always too busy engaging in her actual love affairs and I was left with two older siblings hurt and neglected by the lack of presence from their parents that they took out all their rage and anger out on me.” She said matter-of-factly.
“The truth is I’m just tired. I just want to rest in peace. I just want to sleep.” She said and slowly got up and stretched her arms and legs. She then grabbed a shovel that was placed nearby behind a wheelbarrow full of compost bags and seed packets and began digging up the soil near her father’s grave.
“Dig deep. Dig deep. Dig deep.” She muttered to herself almost robotically as she heaved the shovel deeper within the ground and hurled the soil to the large heap of dirt she had compiled to her right hand side. The voices had come back now whispering over each other in hushed murmurs making absolutely no sense, but for once there was no pain. No blinding migraines. No ringing sounds, just peace and quiet. In fact, Sienna couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so euphoric. Her mind was refreshed and so clear of any bad depressing thoughts. This was the best idea she had ever conceived. This was brilliant.